I started out this morning with the full intention of writing about croissants, pain au chocolat, or french onion soup… some of the better things in life. Instead, I woke up with a laundry list of minor grievances: sore throat, aching back, I missed a chance to get dressed up and go out with friends last night, and I didn’t make it to the park with Mr. B. this morning. I was thinking about all the places I thought I was supposed to be. Then walking my regular route with Mr. B, I realized I am already HERE, just where I should be.
Last night, I wasn’t at the party. I was at home warm and snug in my bedroom watching an old episode of Project Runway while my husband looked on and we made small talk about the outfits – good, bad, and ugly. I was home when my younger son returned from an overnight trip. Instead of texting to find out where he was and how it went, I was home to greet him, fix him a bite of food, and hear about the basketball game (they lost.)
This morning, I wasn’t at the park walking my dog. Instead, I was walking along one of the most gracious and lovely avenues in Paris. I had three conversations (in French) with strangers. They were curious about my dog and his fluorescent jacket. Three lovely opportunities to connect that I might have missed if I was walking the park trails in solitude. And to top it off, I saw several bushes striving to bloom on this cold and frosty morning, just like me.
So – I learned my lesson – I am not always were I think I should be – but I am somewhere – HERE, and that matters, too. It has been too easy for me to lose track of that thought. Too, too often, I can get caught up in “supposed to” and forget about the present. Which of course, is a present. It isn’t always wrapped up pretty with a bow, and it isn’t always easy, but it’s what I’ve got.
(2015 has set me on an introspective roll – perhaps I will return to the regularly programmed croissants, etc next time xoxo)